THE CALM BEFORE THE STORM – CORONAVIRUS CONTINUED…DIY Coronavirus…

Our freezer is stocked with frozen fruits and vegetables because those are perishable.  I cooked a little and froze a dish or two.  We keep the car tank full although they are now telling us to stay home.  We already have cabin fever even though this was a very mild winter (but there is no global warming, right?)  What will we do?

I will cook.  I hate to clean and I doubt coronavirus will change that.  Will I want my cleaning lady to come?  Hmmm…Her son works in the City as a first responder.  Too close for comfort?  I will put off thinking about that one for a bit.

I have to get my roots dyed.  Should I go to the salon that I know is frequented by people from Asia and the Mideast?   Hmmm… My husband, the eternal optimist, has already nixed that idea so I am toying with DIY – doing my roots myself.

What will we do if decide to skip the gym for the duration of this period?  Well, I could draw and paint and make a mess but who will clean it up?  I could watch the news and eat myself to death.  I can use the time to DIY garden.  Hmmm….

IF we survive physically, will we survive as a couple if we are holed up for a long period of time?  Hmmm….My husband may want sex nonstop for entertainment.  He is in his late 70s…Hmmm….

 

 

 

 

 

LIFE IN SIMPLE TERMS

 

If you would have told me that I would write a book when I retired, I would never have believed you.  If you would have told me that I would spend a lot of time preparing all kinds of vegetable dishes in my retirement, I would never have believed you.  If you had told me that we would be working in our retirement and still be paying a mortgage, I would never have believed you.  

Yet, here we are.  My book is still selling and I still have great reviews.  My compost bin is full of vegetable clippings since our dietician insists that vegetables are the way to go.  I find vegetables boring so I spend more and more time trying to find exotic ways to couch the plain vegetables we are supposed to eat.  Half a plate of them at each meal!  Plus, we are not allowed to add salt.  I am still tutoring, even more than last year.  My husband is still tutoring any chance he gets.  We are still paying down a first mortgage and yes, we have an equity line.  I guess we are doing okay because they always ask if we have a second equity line in addition, and they are always impressed that we do not.

I find I do not have the energy I used to have.  If I go food shopping, I cook the next day.  If I cook one day, I do the laundry the day after.  One day, one activity.  And on the days that we exercise, well, that IS the activity.  

If you told me that I would stop caring about my house and let things slide a little, NO one would have believed you.  Yet, I look the other way a lot now.  

So that is how aging happens.  It creeps up on you.  You focus on the past.  You appreciate what you have been through.  You obsess about health – yours and your loved ones.  And you see the future through your grandkids.  You are not that relevant and you know it.  But the grandkids…they are the raison d’être, and you focus on them.  When you go on vacation, you don’t bring home souvenirs because honestly, who needs them?  But you send age appropriate ones to your grandkids.  You want them to be comfortable in the big world and you want the big world to open up to them.  And you have to stop your thoughts from going there, to the dark places, to the real concerns, the real fears and worries – the pollution, the climate, the out of control weapons grade guns that are everywhere.  You have to stop your mind from thinking about the future of our democracy.  You have to stop seeing the robots that are now appearing everywhere, including our very own supermarket.  You have to focus on the good.  So you do.  And you are already counting the minutes till you see your grandkids again.

MY PROMO JUST STARTED AND 155 PEOPLE ARE READING MY BOOK!

Thank you KINDLE for suggesting that I offer a free promo.  And just in time for Mother’s Day.   http://www.kindle.com RAGING AGAINST AGING: Kicking & screaming, laughing & crying, stretching & kvetching by Jacqueline Becker.  HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY!

FREE PROMO of my book: RAGING AGAINST AGING on kindle.com May 9-14.

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY.  You can read my book for free on kindle.com.  ENJOY!49178127_993156517559351_912127770929135616_n.jpg

IS THERE SEX AFTER SLEEP APNEA? (con’d)

Of course, if basketball is your sport, you know that the professional players all wear mouth guards.  Your man can play any position ——— figuratively and literally.  In fact his snore guard makes him appear younger, sexier, and more desirable especially if you take your reading glasses off.  You are so blind, that without your reading glasses you really cannot tell the difference between a mouthguard and a snore guard, a twenty year old and your husband, a muscular athlete and your old man.  So have a beer, and show that team spirit!  And bring on your own kind of Miami Heat!

IS THERE SEX AFTER SLEEP APNEA? (CON’D)

Of course, if basketball is your sport, you know that the professional players all wear mouth guards.  Your man can play any position ——— figuratively and literally.  In fact his snore guard makes him appear younger, sexier, and more desirable especially if you take your reading glasses off.  You are so blind, that without your reading glasses you really cannot tell the difference between a mouthguard and a snore guard, a twenty year old and your husband, a muscular athlete and your old man.  So have a beer, and show that team spirit!  And bring on your own kind of Miami Heat!