B.C. and  A.D.


B.C. takes on new meaning when you hear the five letter c word that you never want to hear.

Before Cancer – means when you were worrying about nonsense.

A.D. means After Diagnosis

A.D. means you have to learn a whole new language.  You have to make decisions that you are not equipped to make because you are not a doctor.  You have to decide on a doctor,  the kind of procedure, the hospital,  the follow-up procedures.  You might as well be in a foreign country picking from a smorgasbord whose language you do not understand. 

It may be called freedom of choice but I call it you are on your own and good luck!!!!!!!!!!


My Mother

I am an only child.  I wish I had a sister.  I could pretend her name is Johanna.  I have always loved that name.  Johanna and I could get together for a cup of coffee twice a month – just the two of us.  We could share DNA stories and laugh.  I got Mom’s fucked up feet.  You got Mom’s premature white hair.  I got Dad’s space between the teeth.  You got Dad’s flat feet.  I got Mom’s arthritis.  Hopefully you don’t get Mom’s cancer.  We could laugh and cry remembering. 

At 65, my mother had gone in for a routine hysterectomy  and called me to tell me that she “had had a touch of cancer.”  She didn’t know what kind. It turned out to be mesenchymal sarcoma.  A very rare and unusually aggressive kind of cancer.  Sloan Kettering gave her a 25% chance of making it. 

She did survive.  She survived the surgery and the chemo and she went on to live another 26 years.  She survived breast cancer at the age of 72.  She survived a rare form of noncontagious TB at 82.  She took megadoses of two very potent antibiotics for 18 months.  She developed a yeast infection and lost twenty five pounds. She managed to cure it by eating Activia yogurt.  At 87, she fell and broke her back.  She got shingles.  And only then did she retire from her part time job.!